noemiluisa

You look at me, with bright blue eyes Three feet away, a stare so intense it transfixes me as mine transfixes you. My eyes speak to you, of things I cannot say well enough in words. I yearn to touch you, to hug you, to reach for your cheek, to take in your scent, and to gently trace the patterns of your skin; from the top of your shoulders to your forearms, until my hand will meet yours. We're a mere three feet from each other, and yet I cannot touch you; for caution keeps us apart. I see you confused, as we connect through wordless gazes. Yet I cannot clarify, I cannot speak, for even my breath must not reach you. Thus forced, in self-imposed silence, I choose to content myself with sharing a stare as full of cryptic meanings as my tongue is bereft of words.

O, how sweet it is to fall in love, that dulcet breeze on my skin, that soft tickle deafening my ears. Even my brain tickles! And I can think of nothing but the object of my desire. Ah! How spicy is the flavour of love. It pierces my nostrils and burns my eyes and tongue and lungs. My throat is clenched and I can hardly breathe. My stomach is sealed while my mind soars the skies. And I feel, I could live off clouds.

My words can't reach you; My fingertips, stretched out, cannot graze your skin. In silence, I watch, your silhouette dissipate as the heat. In the distance, everything is blurred, And we, become strangers.

This morning I jumped, One step too late. I couldn’t catch it; the train left without me. Had it not been for a harsh voice I suspect my arm would have left with it. A white shirt, short hair, a lanyard, It was a short interaction, Yet it was intense. His eyes, grey, stared at me As I, in a frenzied panic, Unloaded all of my mis-adventures on him. He smiled, perhaps, grimacing on the inside… I’ll never know. It was just that, five minutes, a few words And then he was gone, Lost into the trail of people On that cold winter platform.

Darkness falls, on my eyes. Engulfed, I am held in an embrace. You take my hand, and pull. Unresisting, I let you be my guide. In this dance, here and now, If you lead, I will follow. Blinded I need no light other than the tips of your fingers. Fallen across the emptiness of the night Turning silence into desires burning wild; I feel your breath where there is no air, I feel your beats where there is no sound. And as you step me into the next turn I yearn for your touch to direct me. In this icy cold suspended time Nothing matters but connection. Like gravity, you pull but I learnt to be weightless long ago; Thus it is with willingness that I lean into your scent.

My hand slides over you, And your eyes close. Should we share our names? But what’s in a name, if not only sounds, Colours which clash when I breathe into you. My fingers into yours, Our skin one carpet. Do we even know each other? But what does it matter, if soon it will be morning, And tonight’s us are the dead of tomorrow?

Words clash, in silence. In my mind they clutter, A trail of questions marks I cannot breathe out. “Why are we here?” “Why are we doing this?” “Are we just moving along for each other’s sake, forcing something neither of us wants?” Words clutter my brain, deafening sounds of crashes, running after each other, they clash. And nobody is talking.

I planted the seed, On a terrain away from shade, Fed by sunlight in the day, and moon’s gaze in the night. I watered the seed with care and attention, I fed it love and healthy nutrients, I kept watch as threats approached, I sheltered it in the rain, and watered it in the drought. I waited, patient, for seasons to come around. And when the new Spring came, I checked the soil, hand grazing the earth, Searching for that sprout which didn’t come. Resentful and abject, I lamented to the skies, “O, you, wicked plant who betrayed my love and trust. You who took my love and made dried land out of it. You who enticed me with promises of fragrant fruits and undelivered flowers. Begone, you master of temptation and deception!” Upturning you was not enough. There were no branches to burn, no roots to eradicate, no stems to pick apart. Had I been wrong? Had I overwatered you, when you had not asked? Had I fed you, when you were not hungry? Had I taken away rain’s touch, when you

You look at me, with bright blue eyes Three feet away, a stare so intense it transfixes me as mine transfixes you. My eyes speak to you, of things I cannot say well enough in words. I yearn to touch you, to hug you, to reach for your cheek, to take in your scent, and to gently trace the patterns of your skin; from the top of your shoulders to your forearms, until my hand will meet yours. We're a mere three feet from each other, and yet I cannot touch you; for caution keeps us apart. I see you confused, as we connect through wordless gazes. Yet I cannot clarify, I cannot speak, for even my breath must not reach you. Thus forced, in self-imposed silence, I choose to content myself with sharing a stare as full of cryptic meanings as my tongue is bereft of words.